Night Class Drabbles
by HK-Revan
Summary: The Night Class needs some love. This is a multi-crossover fiction with various characters from different stories as teachers or students or just plain crazy people. The poor vampire students will not know what they're getting into. Bleach
1. Chapter 1

A/N: This is a story about a series of oneshots or several shots for the Night Class. Not just focusing on a few characters but on the night class in general.

It will be short, the chapters, but hopefully packed full of humor and hopefully make you all laugh till you cry. Or sad. Or crazy...

If it seems strange, just work through it.

This is a multiple crossover with practically anything I can work around and some OC's. If you have any suggestions for any fandom crossover, please PM me or mention it in your review.

The timeline is kinda wacked, so most of it will be AU or just WERID.

As for my other stories, I will update them when I can.

'sits in gloomy corner' 'feels depressed due to lack of reviews' 'indicates to O Brother Where Art Thou story'

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Chapter One: The First Substitute.

It was a boring start for the Night Class. The various elite vampires were sprawled around on the chairs, waiting patiently for their substitute teacher. The person who was supposed to be teaching them went down with some sort of aggressive flu. Which was strange considering their teacher was a vampire. Rarely do vampires get sick.

They barely looked up when the door swung open with a loud creak sound. The smell of human filled their nostrils and a few looked up to see a tall boy standing next to the teacher's desk with two huge suitcases and a messenger bag. He was dressed in Day Class uniforms.

Shuffling and ruffling was heard as the vampires turned to gaze at the human. He looked nondescript and tasty. But they knew that breaking the rules would have Kuran Kaname mad at them. The pureblood vampire was still flicking through his book, not paying attention to the newest attraction.

The vice president of the Night Class stood, taking control in Kaname's stead. "Are you lost?" He asked, very politely.

The human looked up to frown at the vice president. "You're Takuma Ichijou, right?"

Ichijou nodded.

The human shook his head. "Naw, The Headmaster wanted me substitute for today."

His answer sent a ripple of shock and whisperings across the class, as the more bored vampires looked up to peer at the strange human. Usually the Day Class and Night Class don't intermingle due to the fact that the Day Class isn't suppose to know that the Night Class are vampires.

"Really?" Ichijou met the Headmaster and while the human was eccentric, he wasn't stupid or malicious enough to send a non hunter into vampire midst, aside from Yuuki that is but Yuuki had Kaname and that was enough.

The human yawned. "He woke me up at near freaking midnight, telling me that I should teach you guys about String Theory." He tried to smother his yawn. "I got a PhD in it, so I'm plenty qualified to teach you guys."

Now every vampire was looking at the tired human. A lifespan of a human was nothing compared to a vampire. To hear that someone so young got a PhD in one of the more difficult mathematical approaches to theoretical physics was astonishing.

Hanabusa Aido looked up from his book he was doodling in. "String Theory? Why that?"

Their teacher was just starting on physics. Aido himself could run circles around most of the class in most mathematical subjects and was utterly bored. Personally, he had just started researching String Theory to stop himself from getting bored.

"I have no clue." The human gave them a sour look. "I am supposed to be studying for a test tomorrow and I can't really do that if I'm teaching you numbskulls about String Theory."

Soen Ruka stood up, blond hair flying back in righteous indignation. "Kaname-sama is not a numbskull!"

The human rolled his eyes. "I see you are one of those screaming fangirls just like those in the Day Class going Kya, kya, kya." He gave her a dismissive look. "For tonight, I'm you're teacher and that means you have to do what I say or else I will fail you."

"Ruka." Kaname's soft voice floated in the air, stopping any potential fight. "Sit down, please."

She sat.

Kaname closed his book before looking at the boy. "Please excuse Ruka, she is excitable at times." He paused. "May I ask your name teacher?"

The boy looked at Kaname as one would a fellow student. "My name is Chester Tate."

For a brief moment, he looked uncomfortable, as any human would before the penetrating gaze of a pureblood vampire. He soon smoothed into a state of bubbling animosity towards the class in general.

"Hey, you don't have any authority on us!" Aido stood up, finger in full pointing mode. "You're only the sub and you're also a student. So hah!"

A piece of chalk smacked him square between the eyes, causing the poor vampire to fall backwards with a cry. "Ow!"

Chester tossed a piece of chalk up and down in the air. "For now I'm your teacher, which means I can smack you with a ruler or throw chalk."

Ruka bristled, ready to defend her precious Kaname. A hand came into her view telling her to not move. Kaname had everything under control.

"Tate-sensei I am sure you know of the Night Class secret?" Kaname asked, wondering how many humans will learn that the Night Class were made of vampires. It wouldn't be good to antagonize.

"That you're a bunch of really rich people and you have a lot of clout politically and socially?" Chester raised an eyebrow. "When was that ever a secret?"

After a moment of silence, Kaname merely shook his head. "You are correct." He looked at his fellow vampires telling them not to do anything to Chester about their vampire status. Let him believe what he wants to believe.

Chester moved the chalkboard, clearing the board. He was tad bit pissed off that he had to teach, in his opinion, a bunch of brats about very theoretical and complicated quantum theory. He had more important things to do and he was also really tired. His mood could be defined as pissed off and sour.

Chester turned to face the class, his demeanor decidedly not nice. "If I'm going to suffer, you are all going to suffer with me." He smiled at them maliciously. "Let's have String Theory 101."

He took out a chalk and starting writing on the chalkboard, making each stroke into screech reminiscent of nails on chalkboard. That is torture for humans, for vampires it is cruel and unusual punishment. Never had they ever wanted to have the puny hearing of humans than ever before.

Each screech went into one ear and cork screwed right into their brain. It made an odd ringing sound that wasn't good.

Aido was clutching his head with both hands, eyes twitching at the pure agony. Each and every other vampire was in the same state, even Kaname. The pureblood was too proper to show his discomfort but he had a nervous twitch in his fingers.

The poor vampires really couldn't do anything about it without breaking the rules. They couldn't stuff their ears and take notes at the same time. So they endured like good students going beyond the call of excellent students and even vampires. No doubt, Zero would be laughing his head off at the pain the vampires were receiving.

This went on for an hour, an hour of pure torture and pain. Learning and pain blended not shaken. Chester was actually good at lecturing, if only it weren't for the screech sounds then they might have even enjoyed it.

Thankfully their torture stopped at the ring of a cell phone. The ring tone was a soft chiming sound. It was music to their ears. Chester, evil maniac, stopped from writing to pick up the cell. He flipped it open, examining the message before flipping it shut.

Chester looked at the class. "Do problems on pages one through one hundred fifty, all." He picked up the two suitcases and opened them. "Oh, and tell anyone about this and I will shoot you all in the head."

He ended his threat by assembling several parts together. Despite themselves, the vampires were very interested into what he was doing. After a minute, it was done. The thing he was assembling was a big gun with a scope, silencer and it was bigger than he was.

Chester hefted the gun, setting it up, parallel to the big window. "I need peace and quiet; one peep and I will blow your body apart with this really powerful gun. It can take out a person one thousand yards away, blowing their head off. I don't think you want to know what kind of damage it can do a few feet away."

The vampires didn't want to know what would happen to them if they get shot by that gun. Even they will not survive getting blown into bits, only purebloods could and they weren't purebloods save Kaname. While the gun looked to unwieldy, they did not want to take chances. Not even the hunters had this kind of gun. Hopefully the hunters won't ever produce such a gun.

For a very long minute, not a sound was made. The finger squeezed the trigger, the smell of gunpowder and blood filled the air. The recoil shook the desk, making it creak. Chester sat up, pulling out binoculars looking through them out the window. After a few seconds, he placed them down, a frown marring his face.

"Che, I missed." He jumped off the desk. "Now I have to chase him." He mumbled to himself. "Why do they have to run? Tracking them down is such a pain."

He pulled out two desert eagles and placed them into his waistband. Chester had long unbuttoned his outer jacket, and loosened his tie. Chester picked up his gun, the long strap making it easier to carry. He walked towards the window, quite prepared to chase his target down with the humongous rifle on his back before stopping. He paused, thinking, before propping the gun on the wall.

He backed up before running up to the window. With a leap, he jumped through the glass window shattering the glass. The vampires rushed to the window, catching the sight of their former teacher jumping through the trees agile like a cat.

"Thank you Seiren for not hurting Tate-sensei." Kaname said quietly, not bothering to look up at his silent bodyguard.

"He's pretty fast for a human." Noted Aido, staring out of the window. "Reminds me of the hunters."

"He isn't though." Besides his other official duties, Ichijou keeps track of any potential foes. "Neither does he match any of the descriptions of known hunters and vigilantes."

"How bothersome." Murmured Senri Shiki. "He looked tasty though."

Rima Touya tossed him some blood tablets. "Feed."

"What are we going to do with the rifle?" Kain indicated to the still smoking gun. "We're going to get in trouble."

Aido shrugged. "Who cares." He went over chalkboard. "It's not like he gave instructions, we should just sleep!"

He leaned against the board nearly falling when it flipped around. Aido stared at the writing on the board. "Do the homework or I'm going to shoot you all." He read aloud before yelping. "Kaname-sama, are we going to let a human do this to us?"

Kaname looked up from his book. "If we get started now, we should be done by the time class is over."

Aido heaved a great sigh. "Yes Dorm Leader."

The rest of the vampires did as Kaname suggested. After all, he was a pureblood of the Kuran bloodline.

The class were relieved when a phone call revealed that their teacher will be returning. They didn't know if they could stand the homicidal human with the sniper rifle. After that night, they never saw him again. Apparently he transferred out. Some of the smarter vampires theorized that he just transferred in to find whoever he was targeting and eliminated him.

Little did the Night Class know, they were getting more substitute teachers. Each with their own personal quirk.

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How did you like it? This is one of the aforementioned OC's. He might pop up later...

Here are a list of possible crossovers so far.

Star War-Yoda (more maybe)

Halo-Master Sergeant

Naruto-Kakashi (more maybe)

Transformers-Optimus Prime, Bumblee, Ratchet, Ironhide (more maybe)

Bleach-Yourichi, Urahara, Ulquiorra, Gin...(more to be added)

Hellsing-Allucard

Dead Like Me-George

Reaper-Sam, the Devil

There will be more. I will love your suggestions.


	2. Hellsing

"My name is Alucard and I am your teacher for tonight."

The night class stared at the figure that stood in the front, his fedora and hiding his face. But that wasn't what they were staring at, they were staring at the big hand gun that he was holding.

"My master told me not to shoot you all." He stared at them, his red eyes gleaming brightly. "She was very vehement."

He grinned, showing his big teeth, his sharp canines. "I do hope you will try to be disobedient."

"Then I can teach you all about guns." He cocked it for emphasis.

"Rest assured, Alucard-sensei." Kaname seemed to be the only one who looked unperturbed by the big gun or the crazy vampire holding it.

"Who are you?" Alucard didn't even bother look at the class list.

"Kuran Kaname." Said the pureblood politely.

A bright glint entered Alucard's eyes at the name.

"Kaname eh?" Alucard chuckled. "It has been a long time."

Kaname merely smiled. "Yes. It has."

The rest of the class was mystified.

Two minutes into the lesson and the door banged open. "Master." A girl with an enormous chest ran in. She was dressed in police uniform. "Ghouls."

Alucard grin's widen. "Finally." He took out his gun and went over to the window. He aimed down and fired.

The window shattered and the loud screams of pain ringed in the silence. Alucard laughed again, even louder and louder showing his big teeth. He then jumped through the window.

The servant vampire gave the class a look of regret. "Sorry about the window."

She then ran off, pulling a massive gun out of nowhere and followed her master through the window.

The class just stared blankly at the broken window before looking to Kaname for directions.

The pureblood looked vaguely amused. "I suppose class has ended if the teacher is gone."

His words were then followed by very loud gunshots.

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Don't worry, Alucard will be back.

Jackie Chan Adventures next!!


	3. Bleach

The following week when the night class ambled into their class, there was a distinctive lack of a teacher. Instead there was a cat, sitting on the table licking its paws and not even glancing at them.

Why is there a cat here?

When the vampires finally got into the class and sat down, then they saw the mammoth of a man standing near the wall hidden by the shadows. A small pink bundle standing on his shoulder should have made the man look less menacing and yet it didn't.

That was disturbing.

You would think the vampires would be used to this stuff, strange things that go bump in the night, but then again it wouldn't be as funny now.

The tall man stood, towering over the students. His face was crisscrossed with scars. He also had one eye was covered by an eye patch. The suit he wore seemed to be almost bursting at the seems as his massive frame bulged with muscles.

To their surprise, the pink bundle was alive. It was a small child, with wide curious eyes. It was also a She. The small girl hopped off the moving mountain, and onto the table.

"Hello!" She said, smiling at them. "Ken-chan doesn't like talking cause he's made cause he got tricked into doing this." She giggled. "But I like this and there is so much candy that glasses man gave me."

She pouted, lips jutted out. "But Booby-chan said she'll give me more candy."

The small girl hopped up and down. "Booby-chan you promised me candy."

The class had no clue to whom she was referring to.

"It's in the bag next to the chair." Said a low husky male voice, a very sexy voice too if evident by a few blushes from the stoic vampire females.

The pink girl scrambled over the bag, ripping it open and started loudly munching on the candy. The cat sat up, moving to the edge of the desk.

"Hello."

Everyone stared. The cat spoke. It spoke in that sexy husky low male voice that made many of the female vampire's eye twitch at the lost opportunity.

With a poof and the clearing of smoke a naked woman appeared. "My name is Yourichi."

Nosebleed abounds.

From males and females.

Yourichi noted that she hadn't lost her touch yet.

She grinned at the class, her cat like eyes watching their faces and their reactions. She had noticed, in the beginning, they had not smelled human. But they still react like ones.

She stretched, showing more skin than before causing a few loud crashes onto the floor. A few of the students had fallen out of their chairs for various reasons.

Ah, this would be fun thought Yourichi eyes alight mischievously.

"I do believe public indecency is a punishable offense." Said a male voice. "As is pedophilia."

Yourichi zeroed in on the person. What made her pause was the way he was looking at her, but not directly at her. Also, he was the only person who wasn't distressed by her current state of nudity.

"Ah but Yachiru-chan isn't looking." Yourichi pointed out, Yachiru's eyes were covered by the big man's hand. The small girl was still eating candy.

"Please." The boy continued looking-not looking with his calm face.

Yourichi tilted her head before smiling. "I think I like you kid." She transformed back into a cat before speaking again. "I am not your teacher anyways, Kenpachi is."

The big man moved to the front of the class.

He did not say his name but just looked at the class with his one eye. Most of the class had recovered and were sitting back in the seats quietly. A few of them were cursing Yourichi for her beautiful body and exotic looks.

"Listen up brats." He spoke, his voice booming. "I will only say this once."

He stared at them, the intensity of it unnerving a few of the vampire nobles.

"Piss me off and I will beat you into the ground."

He said it with such resolve and bloodthirstiness, that the class knew instinctively he would do what he said. They could sense the predator in his skin. They could feel it in the air.

"Now, who wants to fight me?"

There was absolute silence.

Yourichi sighed before padding over to Kaname and settling herself into his lap. He would be most likely the only person who would pet her after revealing her true self. She was right.

She chuckled to herself. Whoever he loves, he loves so much he would not even look at other women.

The door opened. "Rukia, how can you be sure its over here?" Shouted a familiar voice.

"Silence fool, of course it is here." The words were accompanied by a cough as Rukia elbowed the taller bow in the gut.

"Ichigo." Said a thundering voice.

Ichigo turned, just realizing who was in front of him. He gaped. "Kenpachi?" As if not believing it be true.

Kenpachi grinned. "Fight me Ichigo!"

Ichigo's only answer to start running in the opposite direction. Kenpachi followed, laughing as he went. Rukia stared blankly before chasing after them. Yachiru followed, still munching on candy screaming. "Go Ken-chan!"

Again a collective silence.

"Class is over, I assume?" Asked Kaname, amused scratching Yourichi's ears. Yourichi purred, rolling over slightly. Oh yes, he does excellent ear scratches.

"Slut." Said someone.

The night passed. The next day, one Ruka had to dodge ninja attacks for the entire day making her sleep deprived. On her pillow was a note attached with a knife.

It had a butterfly signature on it.

She still gets periodically attacked.

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And now onto Jackie Chan Adventures.


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